Even though I've been a member of the "Liberal Hollywood Elite" for 15 years, I have never been invited to an orgy.

Instead, I get invited to roughly three dozen charity events a year. Last Monday night, for example, I attended a dinner in which the Hollywood community raised $1.2 million for the Los Angeles Free Clinic. Week after week, people in this community put so much time and effort toward sharing their good fortune. I can think of no other industry that gives more.

Why, then, do so many conservatives hold us in the same esteem as the proprietor of the local porn shop? Are our morals and values so different from the rest of America? I believe "Hollywood" is more like middle America than many people imagine.

I'm from Illinois (blue state), and my wife of 12 years is from Texas (red state). We have three children, two dogs and a picket fence. This was a typical weekend for us: Saturday, we went to our kids' soccer games (one loss, one tie). Saturday night we took the kids to see a movie (The Incredibles). Sunday, we went to a child's birthday party. Sunday night, we had dinner at home. Highlight of the weekend: My 6-year-old son scored a goal, his second ever. Lowlight: A bad magician. (Note: We didn't see Sean Penn or Michael Moore even once.)